Speakers get comfortable with your audience.
With Halloween just around the corner, I am reminded of things that scare us. Generally cited at the top of the list of things we fear is public speaking. After years of working as a communication coach and working with speakers who fear getting in front of an audience to deliver a message, I’ve tried to understand the root cause of this fear in order to help my clients successfully deliver their presentations. Through my research, what I have discovered is that the fear isn’t really about being afraid of speaking in front of a group of people. The fear stems from a fear of rejection by the audience.
Even celebrities, think 
Sally Fields and her iconic Oscar acceptance speech, fear rejection.
As a speaker, you might be familiar with those head-trashing thoughts that come before you deliver a speech: “Will they like me?” “Will they accept what I’m going to say?” “Are they going to accept me?”
Tens of thousands of years ago, we lived in groups or tribes. If a member was kicked out of the tribe for some reason, they could not survive. Even today, if an infant does not receive support to ensure their biological and emotional needs are met, the infant does not develop into a healthy adult, or could potentially develop a syndrome called failure to thrive. We, as humans, are hard-wired for connections with others. Research has shown that when we feel rejected, the social pain hurts just the same as physical pain. In fact, social pain is felt in the same part of our brains as physical pain (Leiberman, M.D., 2013, Social: Why Our Brains are Wired to Connect).
What are ways a speaker can overcome the fear of rejection?
1. Speak with audience members before your speaking event. Ask the program planner for a few members you can interview so that you can gain a better understanding of their challenges and problems. This will allow you to weave in their stories and your solutions. And you will build a better connection with your audience.
2. Find common ground with your audience. Discovering ideas, experiences, beliefs and values that are in common with your audience will build rapport and connection with them.
3. Get to your venue early to set up. This will allow you the time to meet and speak with audience members before it’s your turn to speak. When you see the people you have met beforehand as you are speaking, it will seem as though you have friends in the audience, and you will feel more at ease.
4. Know that your audience wants you to succeed. Too often our thoughts are focused on our own performance when delivering a presentation. Shift your thinking outward and focus on how you can best serve your audience. Audiences can feel when we have their best interest at heart. This will quickly pave the path to their acceptance of you.